GYROFROG communications
Your fortune: You will not shop at Chess King® today.
Joe Henderson born April 24, 1937

Next time you're in an elevator, press a different floor than the one you intend to visit. Go around and greet everyone on that floor with "Hey, Sylvester!" even if they're a male. When you're confronted, exclaim "And awaayyy we go!" and run off, Jackie Gleason style. Use the stairs when leaving that floor and shout an obscenity (your choice) on the way down.

P.S. If detained, make sure to make a video of the proceedings, and repeatedly ask "Am I being detained?!"